Teaching in the same university, though in different colleges, Anuradha Marwah and Sanjay Kumar first met as colleagues in a syllabus revision committee in 1991. Both were dealing with incompatibility in their married lives at the time, and became friends.
After a few years and after both had divorced their spouses, their friendship turned into love, and now they’ve been living in for 16 years.
“ [ The second relationship] destructures and restructures the notion of family. it is challenging!” —Sanjay Kumar
“It wasn’t an easy decision, but as both our marriages had ended and both of us were a little lost and adrift, we decided to take the plunge,” says Anuradha.
Anuradha has two sons from her first marriage and worried how they’d adjust to Sanjay, also a theatre artist. “This has been a challenging space and also constantly negotiated,” says Sanjay. “It takes us into areas uncharted, where people seldom venture. It destructures and restructures the notion of family.”
“Emerging from the toxic relationship of my first marriage, I realised the importance of normal; how unusual ‘normal’ is,” says Sanjay. Adds Anuradha, “Our relationship has made me more confident, less anxious – a happier person!”
LOVE, HATE, TOLERATE
Anuradha: I love him for his passion for theatre and have nothing to hate.
Sanjay: I love her for what she is.
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From HT Brunch, February 12, 2019
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First Published: Feb 12, 2019 16:02 IST